“When you coach, you don’t need to be the expert. You don’t need to be the smartest person in the room. And you don’t need to have all the solutions. But you do need to be able to connect with people, to inspire them to do their best, and to help them search inside and discover their own answers.” (Harvard Business Review)

One might have observed examples of a “coach” who claimed all of these attributes that one does not need. At times, with self-relflection and modesty, one can observe these unneeded items in oneself as well:

The “coach” did not ask; the “coach” claimed

the “coach” did not listen; the “coach” imposed

The  “coach” did not empathize; the “coach” aggrandized and agonized 

The “coach” did not purposefully wander into wonder; the “coach” stupefied and stifled 

The “coach” did not uplift; the “coach” made small 

The “coach” did not consider radiating options; the “coach” pinpointed that unquestionable 1 solution

At those moments, the coached might be coached to be the problem and of no use to the “coach”.

That “coach” will move on, obliviously, to the next target, who might satisfy the “coach” but not, to the fullest, the coached.

That “coach” will not *comprehensibly* read the coached. Such ”coach” shall remain convinced to have all the enlightened functional literacy which the “coach” needs, as a fixed singular solution to the problem; always outside of the “coach”.

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The “coach” shall remain stuck in a reductionist dualistic view of the other (excluding oneself) and merely “innovate” within that limitation. 

Such might be a “coach” whom one can observe, experience, and at times one might be oneself; again and again. 

What shall one call or do with such, at times seemingly inescapable, type of “coach”? 

One could move on away from such “coach” but that does not evaporate that “coach”’s mindset. Such “coach” might smell as sweet under any other name: “Teacher”, “Parent”, “CEO”, “Director”, “PhD”, “Priest”, “Guru”, “Professor”, “Judge”, “Consultant”, “Trainer”, “investor”, “Board Member”, “Counselor”, “Guardian”, “Self-made man/woman”, “Community Leader”, “God”, “Hero”, and so on.

That “coach” might take one to the highest of the high, technically; maybe, even seemingly performance-wise. Though that busy and (self-)important “coach”, lacking comprehension, reflection and discernment for life, might take one to one’s lows; humanly.

Any of these, as actual Coaches, need growth mindsets too. Coaches do not need to be experts, not the smartest, not the absolute solution, not the answer to your problem,.

I have met them, I meet them now and at times I see him in the mirror.

And yet, as actual * COACH * , many quietly embrace the other, daily and unwaveringly, in their degrees of modest, rational-altruistic enlightenment (which might be, in a non-dualist sense, a form of tempered-selfishness) and then move humanity; upliftingly, inclusively, contextually, ecologically, with continued reflection and with feed-forwardness. 

“No, I am not one of them, yet,” is what one had best think when one aspires to be an actual * Coach *: “I don’t have the ultimate perfectly measured solution. I am not an expert, I am not the smartest. I reside in your ‘room’ now and not mine. Please, tell me again to listen. Perhaps I can offer a question and one more, and I do thank you for your patience, in me trying to support you; within reason. And, that’s all good.” One can use this as a mantra in confident-modesty while moving forward.

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